"The need to express kindness is as great as the need to receive kindness. Kindly do your part."
(Happy Musings is a newspaper feature syndicated by King Features that I create each day to remind us all that “Life is wonderful!” I offer it here to brighten your day. Please share it with your friends.)
It was a cold, rainy day in
But, as I looked at his feet, beginning to turn blue, I wondered why he had left them out in the cold. The only explanation I could come up with is that they were too far away from his thinking center or that he couldn't be bothered.
I had oftentimes in the past failed to care for parts of my own body, even my feet, because I was doing "more important things." And, at the time they had seemed so far away too. They could take care of themselves. They were easy to forget.
But now that I think about them, they do so much good. They chip in every day, all day long, getting me from here to there, hopping over things, hardly tripping on any path I take. They should be cared for. They should be revered.
Yes, I could understand my son's disregard for them, but also his need to care for them. Now I've decided to look at this slight of foot issue and see where it takes me.
As children we are taught to be kind, to care for one another. It is part of society's civilizing process. It goes on in homes, schools and churches. Without this kindness and care in our lives we would disintegrate as a species, as a society, even as a nation, which is really what we are seeing now.
But also this kindness and care must be present to remain as an intact, healthy human being. Fortunately we have the "ouch" syndrome that keeps us in check. When we cross this threshold, of not being careful, and parts of us get hurt, we hurt. Cutting a finger, getting too close to a fire, tripping on a step and falling, going out in the snow without a jacket and catching cold, lying in the sun for hours without sun protection and getting burned are all indications of a lack of care.
Also there are the hurts from a lack of care that take longer to manifest like smoking and cancer, poor eating habits and heart disease, etc.
The value of being careful cannot be over estimated not only personally, but also nationally and internationally. The lack of care has now affected our financial stability, not only locally, but globally. The government was not careful. Its regulators and legislators were lax. Companies were less than careful. In many cases their CEO's were greedy and morally remiss. Individuals were also not careful, trusting their stability on unstable practices. Banks gave in to the demands of want-to-be homeowners and their own desire to make deals. Care was not taken here. Ouch!
Back to feet and kindness to the body. Cold feet know their limits. Coldness stresses the kidneys and challenges the immune system. If that system is not strong, invaders waltz in and a throat becomes sore. Ouch! Sinuses become infected. Ouch! The head throbs. Ouch!
I was once playing tennis with a friend of mine, Stu Marshall, one of the top orthopedic surgeons in the San Diego area. On this day he mentioned that he had not gotten much sleep the night before. A special case arrived that he had to attend to. A guy had severally damaged his back riding one of those bucking bull machines in a local bar. He had no insurance and no one would help him. Stu took the case, did the surgery and put his back, back in order. I said, "Doesn't it just irk you that a perfectly healthy person would go out of his way to put himself in such danger?"
Stu's response was, "I learned long ago not to judge situations, just handle them." I guessed so. But for the one hurting it is a hard way to learn.
In most cases, without carelessness there would be little need for the services of someone like Stu. How many businesses have grown out of lack of care? Much of the health industry is just that.
Now back to personal care. Why take care again? Because of the "Ouch!" if you don't. But also on another level -- the answer is kindness. Kindness is a loving quality that resides in all of us and we need to bring it out more and more.
Again, as young children we are taught to be kind to one another and to all that is alive -- our cats, dogs, turtles, birds, frogs, etc. Yes, we need to be kind to everything that is alive. But in reality isn't everything alive? Isn't everything made up of this mysterious, miraculous energy we call life? And as such, it is alive and therefore, most worthy of kindness.
If we lived with this awareness how would it change our point of view in regards to care taking? How about it in regards to those cold feet with their active, work-horse toes?
The cells of the toes and rest of the feet come in the form of muscles, ligaments, bone, cartilage, blood and even nails. Each cell is an individual doing his part for the betterment of the whole. He is complete yet dependent upon those around him. He does his job and he appreciates any kindness shown to him.
Now the foot too, as a whole, certainly appreciates kind gestures, i.e. a warm pair of socks on a cold day. The foot with its toes even has friends who will send a message to someone who can help when he is in trouble. But it is for that someone to hear the message, know the foot, including the toes, is cold and in need of covering. And then, it is for that someone to act out of compassion and self-interest to fix the situation. When the one in charge of the big picture fails to hear and heed the voices of the little people, the cells, the one in charge will pay a price and suffer as the lowly toes may be suffering. Ouch!
I have one friend who epitomes kindness in all its forms of caring. Carmen is harmonious in everything she does and beautiful in every way.
Carmen cares for herself, from top to bottom. She does yoga for her body, plays bridge for her mind, studies and invests her money for her financial stability. She has a wonderful husband, but maintains her own individuality, not melting into him. She travels often to far places to feed her curious nature, expanding her knowledge and adding to her life experiences. She is a gourmet cook and charming hostess. She is as adept on the internet as she is comfortable in a roomful of guests. She is someone full of kindness for herself and others. Besides this, she cares for her feet, always providing the best shoes for her walks around town or around Europe. She knows her toes and looks after them.
But how to get a young person like my son to hear the callings of his feet and pay attention to their needs before he ends up with the flu? He is one of the kindest people I know. Everyone agrees. Nope, a mother can't do it. A mother can't bring this to her son's attention. As always, the feet have to fend for themselves.
Why can't we treat our toes like people? Why can't we love them and care for them as if they were our best friends? After a round of tennis, a walk in the park, a twirl on the dance floor, or a wiggle in a bathtub full of bubbles we might just think that they are.
Smiles,
Sally
“Life is wonderful! Don’t forget it.”
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